The 3rd Street Saints, those lovable gangsters who serve as the protagonists of theSaints Rowseries, have been through more genre shifts than theFast and the Furiouscrew. While the franchise began life as a Grand Theft Auto-alike, later installments have seen our heroes become superheroes in a virtual reality simulation, move their headquarters to a spaceship after the destruction of planet Earth, and become pawns in a battle between God and the Devil. That the new installment is said to be a reboot isn’t a surprise, because where do you go after you’ve literally punched Satan in the face?
With four mainline franchise titles and a sizable standalone expansion, let’s rank theSaints Rowgames from worst to best and see who walks away with the title of “The Boss”. And before you ask, no, we’re not includingAgents of Mayhem, because that game now rightfully resides in the ash bin of history.
5) Saints Row
Released in 2006 on the Xbox 360, the originalSaints Rowwas a contender looking to take Grand Theft Auto’s crown as the king of open-world gangster games. While the run-and-gun gameplay and rags-to-riches story were passable, if hopelessly familiar, and the game’s take on street culture was like something out of a bad ‘90s hip-hop video, one element clearly pointed towards the path these games would wholeheartedly embrace in establishing their own identity: humor. The Insurance Fraud side activity, in which players hurl themselves into oncoming vehicles for a payout, was a hilarious diversion that seemed to simultaneously admit defeat and one-up GTA with a philosophy later installments would take to increasingly incredulous heights: If you may’t beat them, at least try to make them laugh.
4) Saints Row IV: Gat Out of Hell
The shortest entry in the series,Gat Out of Hellis a standalone expansion toSaints Row IVthat sends our protagonists to (you guessed it) Hell to rescue their boss who has been kidnapped to marry Satan’s daughter. While it retains the fun superhero vibe fromSaints Row IV,Gat Out of Hell’scrime is that it has no missions - it’s essentially a bundle of side activities stretched over a paper-thin narrative. Completing these activities builds up a meter representing Satan’s wrath towards the player. Build it up enough and you’ll unlock a cutscene and the next “chapter” of the “story”, but with no mission structure, players may find themselves hard pressed to care.
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3) Saints Row IV
Somebody at Volition clearly loved 2007’sCrackdown, Microsoft’s superhero-powered take on sandbox open-world action, becauseSaints Row IVapes the mechanics, right down to the addictive orb-collecting to upgrade abilities. How does a gangster acquire superpowers you ask? Oh you know, the usual way - become President of the United States after subverting a terrorist attack, suffer an alien invasion that results in the destruction of the planet, and become trapped in a virtual reality simulation of Steelport, the city fromSaints Row: The Third.
Over the top and loaded with pop culture sendups,Saints Row IVcobbles elements from the aforementionedCrackdown,The Matrix,Mass Effect,Prototype,Metal Gear Solidand many more in a zany, willfully ridiculous brew that while entertaining, can certainly overstay its welcome. But any game that stars actor Keith David as himself (and your villainous Vice President) knows what it’s about, and for that aloneSaints Row IVdeserves props.
2) Saints Row: The Third
A power fantasy with supremely enjoyable mechanics and the intelligence of a 13-year-old high on Flamin’ Hot Cheetos dust and Mountain Dew Game Fuel,Saints Row: The Thirdis nothing if not a very good time. Whether dropkicking civilians out of their vehicles, slugging baddies in the nethers with a giant purple dildo (just one of the many ridiculous weapons in the game, including a grenade launcher that shoots mind-controlling mollusks) or rampaging through the city in your birthday suit (with a dedicated streaker button!),Saints Row: The Thirdis a sugar rush in game form, a guilty pleasure mainlined straight into your lizard brain. Sure, some of its “edgier” elements haven’t aged well and you may want a hot shower afterwards, but there’s no denying thatSaints Row: The Thirddelivers a mean dopamine hit.
1) Saints Row 2
The heart and soul of theSaints Rowuniverse,Saints Row 2proved the franchise could step out from GTA’s shadow and forge its own identity. Narratively, the series has never been stronger, with its tale of the run-down Saints battling their way back up to the top of the food chain providing relatable human struggles and friendships in terms later games never approach. In terms of gameplay,Saints Row 2still cops from GTA (specifically GTA IV) in good measure, but where GTA as a series was actively striving to present itself as mature,Saints Row 2leaned into its juvenile side with side activities like the Septic Avenger, in which you ride shotgun in a septic truck and spew raw sewage on mansions, civilians and police cars for cash. Insurance Fraud makes a welcome return, as well as Trail Blazing, where the player dons a flame-proof set and rides a flaming vehicle through checkpoints, setting everything in their path alight. It’s the balance between the mayhem and the more mundane that makesSaints Row 2the little bowl of porridge in the franchise: just right.
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